Help! I can’t get my penis out of this thing!

Marcus Brigstock, Savoy Theatre, London

A dull two hour show, sees Marcus Brigstock try to remove his penis from a kitchen appliance in which he has inadvertently got it stuck. This reviewer doesn’t want to give away which appliance, so as to ruin the best (and only) joke of the show. We watch him try everything to get it out, to no avail.

As he gets more and more panicky over the 2 hours, we hear repeated excuses as to how he got it stuck in the appliance in the first place, and each new excuse sounds more pathetic than the last.

At one point a heckler shouts “This isn’t a show, it’s just you with your penis trapped in a kitchen appliance” – Marcus had no come-back for that. At the end of the 2 hour ordeal Marcus breaks down in tears and offers to give everyone their money back.

The queue for refunds is an awkward one, everyone feels sick to the stomach. As Macrus stands at the head of the queue the appliance on a high stall in front of him. No-one makes eye contact.


The Verdict

As we leave the theatre, Marcus is being seen-to by a few members of the St Johns Ambulance in an embarrassing silence.
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Reviews of this review

  • Andrew Kliman
    ★★
    This review triggered me, and although I'm not entirely sure what that means I may well consult my lawyers. Woke. Yes, I said it. Again I'm not sure what it means.

  • ★★★★★
    Having been in a similar situation to Marcus, several times, I loved this show.
  • Marcus Brigstock
    ★★★★★
    I got it out in the end.

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